I was a walking proverb this morning.
Or, to be more precise, a tripping one.
I was carrying a large sack of chicken feed through the backyard when it occurred to me that I was quite possibly having my most productive day ever. I started congratulating myself on getting the breakfast dishes and laundry done so blisteringly quickly that I had the time to clean out the chicken house, all before leaving for play school. However, just as my pride was building, along came my fall....
There was a stray bamboo cane on the grass. It clearly had Bad Intentions, as the rest of its well behaved brethren were stacked politely against the fence. As I passed it leapt from the ground and grappled me into submission. My feet and the cane were more twisted than a Stephen King story.
I fell like a slapstick stunt man; juggling the feed, trying not to crush anyone smaller, stumbling and flailing, and eventually landing on my bum in a giant pile of spilled corn and sunflower seeds.
That, of course, brought a pack of (normally docile) slavering chickens and dogs running to gobble the spoils.
Which I was sitting on.
When I finally extricated myself from under a pile of excited animals, I turned to Bug to check she was alright. With the insouciance only a one year old can muster, she pointed to the stunningly evil bamboo cane and said "look Mummy! Stick!"
Yes my dear, I know.