Monday, May 28, 2012

Pride goeth before the fall

I was a walking proverb this morning.

Or, to be more precise, a tripping one.

I was carrying a large sack of chicken feed through the backyard when it occurred to me that I was quite possibly having my most productive day ever. I started congratulating myself on getting the breakfast dishes and laundry done so blisteringly quickly that I had the time to clean out the chicken house, all before leaving for play school. However, just as my pride was building, along came my fall....

Literally.

There was a stray bamboo cane on the grass. It clearly had Bad Intentions, as the rest of its well behaved brethren were stacked politely against the fence. As I passed it leapt from the ground and grappled me into submission. My feet and the cane were more twisted than a Stephen King story.

I fell like a slapstick stunt man; juggling the feed, trying not to crush anyone smaller, stumbling and flailing, and eventually landing on my bum in a giant pile of spilled corn and sunflower seeds.

That, of course, brought a pack of (normally docile) slavering chickens and dogs running to gobble the spoils.

Which I was sitting on.

When I finally extricated myself from under a pile of excited animals, I turned to Bug to check she was alright. With the insouciance only a one year old can muster, she pointed to the stunningly evil bamboo cane and said "look Mummy! Stick!"

Yes my dear, I know.

Stick.

16 comments:

  1. Bonus is that all those sunflower seeds will pop up :) We had a wheat/sunflower lawn around our feed bins - a little rain was all it took. Other than that I'm afraid there are no comforting words after receiving the cane ;p I hope your day gets better.
    TC

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    1. Thanks TC, I reckon the chickens will eat the seeds before a sunflower plant gets even half a chance! I did get a fair bit back up and into the feed bucket, so I didn't lose too much seed Still, the chickens think it's Christmas!

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  2. Oh, I can relate to this only too well. If there is something to fall over I will do it. Sticks, cracks in the footpath, my own feet, small puffs of air whirling near my ankles. You name it, I can tumble over it slapstick-style. I've just accepted it now that I'm part circus clown. I'm just hoping my son hasn't inherited the fumble foot disease from me.

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  3. As soon as my day starts looking like its going really well, I start keeping an eye out for accidents waiting to happen. Never had anything as spectacular as that though :)

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    1. I swear I fell for a full five minutes.

      I look over my shoulder at fate, too. Especially when I'm very happy!

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  4. Well told story - I hope the only thing that was bruised was your ego!

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    1. Thank you. Sunflower seeds are remarkably soft!

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  5. This is classic. Thanks for sharing.

    And, just in case I've got this wrong...err... you were a proud member of our defence forces, yes?

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    1. Yep. Bloody lucky the Taliban didn't have little sticks.

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    2. Taliban with little sticks...you crack me up! Me, hubby and uncle all had a good laugh at this!

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  6. Sllooooowwwww mmooooottttiiiioooonnnnnnn

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  7. Lmao oh what a nice way to end my day, you poor thing but damm that would have been hell funny to see. Still laughing Jodie:-)

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  8. I hate it when things happen in slow mo like that ... you just know how it's going to pan out. Would have been a good photo opportunity though! cheers Wendy

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  9. I hate that you fell down but I love the way you share it. I feel like I was right there among the rowdy chickens.

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