Tuesday, June 12, 2012

Twilight zone. Now with cheese.

Where have I been?

In the zone!

The zone diet, that is.

Mr Accident is a great one for jumping on the latest diet and exercise bandwagon.

Unfortunately he is an excellent band-wagonner. He's not the kind to quit on the first day. He has guts. He has determination. And that means, as the chief food preparer in the Accidental Household, I'm in this for the long haul.

And seriously, it's a haul. All meal and snacks are broken up into blocks of protein, fat and carbs. Everything has to be weighed or measured to make sure you are getting the right balance. It's a major hassle. And there is so much food! Most of it appears to be cheese.

Mr A convinced me of the benefits of the diet (it actually looks a lot like what we were already eating, but through the lens of multiple measuring spoons) so I've jumped on this shiny new bandwagon too. I might as well, if I'm already measuring for him.

Mr A is so excited we're doing it together. His quote? "This is the biggest thing we've ever done together! (You know, besides getting married and having kids...)"

All the counting means I have had to meal plan like a pro. I have a weekly plan on the fridge, meal menus written onto laminated, colour coded cards, even a laminated shopping list for what I need to buy each week. It's intense. I'm pretty sure I'd win the Extreme Meal Planning reality show (you know, if there was one. Anyone else want to enter?)

My fridge is stacked with prechopped vegies and "blocks" of measured protein. I had to buy so much food that the second outside fridge has been roped in to manage the overflow.

Unfortunately, the outside fridge also holds the chocolate. Which I now can't eat.

I'm not used to this! It's my first diet ever! Previously, when I found I was getting a wee bit pudgy, my plan was "eat less" and it worked a treat. But now I'm dieting, when I stroll past the fast food outlets near the supermarket, instead of barely noticing the multitudes of food I was allowed to eat but didn't much want to, now I turn into a fried food fiend, slavishly wishing I could eat a greasy noodle entree, followed by a chili potato and then a pancake chaser (hold the cheese). I want what I can't have. And I really miss my chocolate!

Well, only time will tell if this diet is going to deliver on the usual promises of increased youthful  vitality, more visible ribs and an aversion to cheese (there is SO MUCH CHEESE). I'll keep you all updated. Because, as we know, there is nothing more interesting than listening to the rambles of the diet obsessed.... *yawn*

Do you diet?

36 comments:

  1. Pia and I once ate a whole camembert in about 5 minutes. There is no such thing as too much cheese. But I hear you on the lack of chocolate... Fortunately my obsession is 70% which is very hard to eat too much of (I ate two pieces today, and was struggling through the second), and since its much less sweet I can convince myself that its healthier. :)

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    1. Oh Camembert, now that I could eat... But this cheese is substandard, cheap cheese. Without crackers. It's sacrilegious to even put it in the same category as a nice Camembert.

      I love the dark stuff too. The super sweet style chocolate doesn't leave me satisfied At All. I could eat a block and still not feel sufficiently chocolated. Two squares of dark and I'm done for the day.

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  2. I'm on the crap diet... It's great you can eat anything you like as long as it's crap.

    3 coffee's for brekky... Sure

    No lunch but happily consume half a pack of chocolate digestives at about 3 pm and then not eat dinner cos I'm not hungry... Why everyday.

    In all seriousness I know my diet needs to improve. How can I expect the fat baby to eat her greens and apples if I wont?

    I worked shift work for a long time so I tend to get hungry at odd times. And I hate brekky...
    Lead by example and all.

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    1. Apparently kids model their dietary habits off their dad more than their mum. So I guess if you just make the Lord eat his veggies then Fats will follow, leaving you free to swap breaky for chocolate bikkies guilt free. Yay!

      My kids are addicted to apples. I pretend they aren't allowed them, so when they get one every day or so it's a massive treat. MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I'm fiendish, I tell you.

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    2. That would explain my chocolate digestive addiction... my dad loves them.

      Thankfully the husband will eat most things put in front of him... so let's hope fatty follows suit.

      Fruit is rarely an issue... she ate a whole kiwi fruit today and bananas I swear is baby crack.

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  3. The Zone Diet is very popular among celebrities. They get all their food delivered and get themselves down to skeletal proportions.

    I'm too busy eating cookies to continue this comment, however. Have a good day!

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    1. Oh, celebrities! The last bastion of good taste and dietary common sense! Oh... Wait...

      I hope I don't go skeletal. I'm actually very happy with my size! I looks better a bit... rounded. Ahem. This is more a healthy, be-more-awesome diet. I expect the awesomeness to kick in any day.... If not, I'm back to cookies faster than Angelina running from the paps.

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  4. Sounds a nightmare, but good luck with it. I'm on 70% chocolate too, lots of greens and cheese now and again. Bets on how long the 'wont' power lasts???

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    1. See? This sounds sublimely sensible. We ate like this too, and what were eating hasn't actually changed all that much. It's more about learning portion sizes, which I desperately needed. I figure I'll stop measuring after a week, and go back to normal in two, but with a better understanding of how much I should be eating! Hopefully the "won't" power can carry me that far :)

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  5. Try Paleo eating, not a diet but a way of eating. cuts out all the grain (gluten) and usually the dairy as well, easy to prepare and results are immediate.
    Rachel in New Zealand

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    1. Mr A would LOVE to go paleo. Me? Not so much. I think this might be him easing me into it...

      That said, he's a coffee addict, so his chances of success on true paleo are pretty much zip.

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    2. alot of Paleo enthuiasists still drink coffee. Paleo isnt that hard, i think it is way easier than lots of measuring and weighing... good luck!

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    3. All of my CrossFit associates are paleo die-hards and drink more coffee that I thought humanly possible.

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    4. I have a mate who is the best advertisement for paleo I could possibly wish for. Fit, no body fat, smartest guy I know. (And a national xf finalist.) If he hasn't convinced me my glass of milk is superfluous, you lot haven't got a hope! I'm a dietary mule of the stubborn variety ;)

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  6. Ha hahahhaa this nutty retired doctor tried to get the husband to do this diet and included him having to wolf down a lot of fish oil....which made him stink like the fish market. He didn't last two weeks (not unusual for him but I was very relieved as the mad doc had also told me to draw pie graphs on my plate and fill each one to the correct ratio).
    Not a bit fan of diets - I do try and make sure we have a balanced diet so my kids are the only ones who know how many serves of each food group are the average for their age lol

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    1. Mmm, fish markets... sexy....

      I wrote a guest post on serves for kids on another blog once, and included a sample meal plan based on the governments advie. Someone got up me for including a biscuit in their afternoon tea. I'm still scarred!

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    2. You're kidding me? Crikey - I consider 4 Anzacs to be equivalent to one bowl of porridge :D
      I'm not sure anyone knows the proper diet....I got a book by the health department and when I looked it up online there were so many essays either supporting it, altering it or ripping it to shreds....and if you compare what the US gov says is healthy, the UK gov says is healthy and our gov says is healthy...well they certainly can't agree on nutrition, that's for sure. Best advice I ever got was from my doctor back in WA....she was awesome...she told me that if my body didn't agree with the official numbers, listen to my body every time (this was after me complaining that I was losing weight eating so much fruit and vege).

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    3. I reckon you have to be really careful of what certain governments recommend. I don't believe they are all completely agenda free.

      I totally agree about listening to your body, especially after giving it time to adjust to a new regime (like quitting caffeine - headaches at first, but the end result is still positive.)

      I reckon Anzacs can also be swapped for weetbix!

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  7. Wow, you are a menu planning warrior. I remember picking up the zone book in a store a long time ago, flicking through it, then suddenly feeling very tired and in need of a lie down. It's very involved. I think it burns calories purely through the huge amount of brain power required to work out what to eat.

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    1. It took me SIX HOURS to work out a weekly meal plan. I actually got a sore bum from sitting still so long! I'm refusing to do another for next week - we're eating the same food every week forever now. Mmm, cheese... *gag*

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  8. hahaha.... I hate diets! Hubby and I have tried a couple (the cabbage soup was the worst - you lose weight simply because the idea of cabbage soup for breakfast lunch and dinner completely puts you off eating!). What I want to know is why, when we are dieting to lose weight, does a diet require so much extra food purchase?! Good luck! We'll be waiting for you on the other side with chocolates and cheesecake ;)

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    1. Is it the other side yet?

      I get a cheat meal on Friday, Mr A is taking me out to a fancy work dinner. And I am TOTALLY having dessert. And wine! And cheese! Oh, wait... maybe not the cheese.

      I bought SO much food for this week. The register lady laughed at me. I actually considered going out to the car with the fruits and veggies then coming back in to buy the meat.

      The cabbage soup diet sounds like a bloody pain. Did you fart like a champion?

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  9. Gosh that sounds so complicated. I always research diets and think they sound too complicated. Mostly I just keep trying to eat healthy. Often I fall off the wagon.

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    1. It's insanely complicated! It took yonks to work put the details. I should sell it as a ready made meal plan and make my fortune!

      I planning on a spectacular fall off this wagon. There will be cookies!

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  10. Diet? God, no. What a waste of time! I'm vegetarian so I tend to keep track of what I'm eating anyhow, especially since too much bread and too much potato *will* make it impossible for me to fit into my jeans.

    ~S.

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    1. That's what I keep telling Mr A! It IS a waste of time. We're eating the same stuff, but counting it instead of just plonking it on a plate, and if you mess up, it comes with a side helping of guilt. Mmmm, delicious guilt.

      I think Peanut is well on the way to vegetarian, for both taste and ethics. Do you have any advice for me on providing her with adequate protein?

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  11. You're totally scaring me with the laminating.

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    1. I'm scaring myself.

      I need someone to police me. **STEP AWAY FROM THE MEAL PLANNING!**

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  12. Of course i am on a diet...have been since i had kids....shame the teen is now a teen...at least i have the twins to blame for the diets not currently working though...if only they wouldn't leave all those morsels on their plate...i mean not everything can go to the chooks and dog surely?
    Good luck with the zone....been there quite a few years ago...was mildly successful and i thought i could never tire of cheese but i actually did, lol! Would love to hear a success story though!!

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    1. I know! The kids leave the tastiest bits! And anyway, anything eaten above the sink or off someone else's plate doesn't count in the calorie stakes...

      I'm hoping I can be your success story. We'll have to wait and see.

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  13. Yeah, I am actually, about 7 weeks in.....battled all my life with weight...and now after the children, my whole body has changed to resemble someone I do not know, and dont want to get to know......Im using a plan....Im on no sugar,not so bad, no bread...really bad...and mostly just lots of veg which I am not finding hard...I have a backyard full of it! Im a proud 5 kilos lighter, my first milestone reached, now for the next 5, and then the next 5. I can relate to it being very hard with meal prep...I chop all my veg at the begining of the week in plastic containers so night time cooking is basically grabbing handfuls of whatever??? and cooking it all up....in amongst planning what I will cook for the children, and husband as sometimes he eats either menu choice......its all in the prep....otherwise it just dosnt work for me.....now I just need to get five minutes to myself to get out and actually , maybe walk somewhere....by myself!

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    1. Well done you!! Five kilos in seven weeks on diet alone is an absolute triumph.

      I miss carbs. I miss them so badly. I actually dreamt about spaghetti last night. I think I might be detoxing...

      My fridge is a mass of chopped veggies in plastic boxes too :)

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    2. Im actually finding the chopped veg really handy, as I buy what I need, chop it all....and I dont have a crisper full of stuff...when it is nearly gone, I throw the remainders in for a veg soup..voila...another few lunches, and then I know exactly what to buy at the shops again for the next week...which reminds me, I need carrots.... :) Good luck with the meals...sounds complicated...I think mine is more a lifestyle change that hopefully will hang around while my kilos nick off...........

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  14. I tried that diet for like two days--what I struggled with was the ala carte nature of it. I had plenty of food, but it was like--cottage cheese and peaches, a couple of hunks of deli meat...lots of compartmentalized things on my plate, so I wasn't sure how I could make a meal out of it. Or, I could do this for breakfast and lunch, but making meals for my family seemed difficult and it wouldn't really work if I was in the zone for two out of three meals a day. And the constant referring to the guide for food groups (although I'm sure that would have gotten easier once I got more familiar with it). Anyway, my husband wasn't dialed into it like yours; I'm sure that makes it much easier. I'd love to hear how it goes for you!

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    1. Dialed in? He STARTED this madness!

      I actually managed to make our normal meals zoned. This means I can cook the usual meals the kids always have, but just measure out the adult's portions. Tonight we had pork steaks with garlic and herb butter, sweet potato, beans and corn. This took a whole heap of fractions, though! Tomorrow is our cheat dinner (we're going out) then I think Saturday is sausages, onion, peas and mash? Getting the fat blocks in is the hardest, it's always "normal food.... plus a macadamia" lol.

      Having just made it through day two, I totally understand why that was your stopping point. At one stage there I was ready to eat the children, my mood was SO BAD and I was SO FLIPPING HUNGRY!! Day three is better :)

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